Marriages are made in heaven, that’s what is generally said, but in our country they usually are made in match-making bureaus or portals. Love-based marriages do happen in India but it is not a usual norm. It is an accepted fact that a person's family will have the most important role, usually more than the individual himself in choosing his/her partner. Here in India more than the union of two souls, marriage is considered to be a blend of two families. Potential brides and grooms are scrutinized as if they are applying for a job and then shortlisted like interview applicants. The funniest part is that the person applying for the job has to indirectly pay an incentive instead of getting one, I hope you understand what am I referring to : The most common and illogical phenomenon in India, DOWRY.
It might sound normal to most but millions of brides till date are harassed mentally , sexually and emotionally and sometimes forced to give away their lives in name of our ‘so-called tradition’, Dowry.
Now what is dowry???
We all know what dowry is : A helpless father paying for his daughter’s marriage in cash or kind either on demand of her would-be husband’s family or in order to prove his love for his daughter and increase his goodwill in the eyes of the society.
Is the bridegroom jobless, homeless or carless ? Is he not capable enough to satisfy his partner’s needs? This concept is more of a business alliance between two families where one family pays the other so that their daughter stays happy. Isn’t this completely indebting the girl’s father, first he gives the most precious part of his life, his daughter and along with that pays for his daughter’s happiness. Is this fair? Isn’t giving away your child enough for a marriage? Is this what marriages really are for? Are we buying love?
Then if we think over, this is one of the major reasons for female foeticide too, because a poor man cannot afford to get his daughter married and make her happy and hence, he chooses to kill the girl child.
Marriages are always projected like a business deal. In most of the marriages, the bridegroom does not want any cash or gift , he is captivated alone by the idea of getting his life partner but the groom's family is in high hopes of dowry . In some cases, it's like an auction of the groom. Whosoever pays more will get the groom. It's not about how compatible the bride and the groom are but more about the bank balance bride’s father has. Many parents think that if they won’t give dowry, their daughters will be tortured , killed or hanged to death. So in hopes of a happy married life for their daughter, they end up disbursing savings of their lifetime . But do they end up being happy?
In most cases, it’s a NO. The groom’s family is never satisfied. Their never ending desires soar to new heights. When the bride’s family is unable to cope up with the ever so increasing demands of the groom’s family, there begins a gruesome tale of torture.
I am sorry to say that, this practice is still prevalent in our MODERN generation too. We live in the 21st century, we claim to be “modern” and consider ourselves broad-minded. But when it comes to marriage , it is supposed to be a big fat fancy wedding which burns a hole in one’s pocket.
It is high time, we need to change our outlook and re-think of what standard we are setting for our future generations. Only if we take a deep insight into our practices, we would know how narrow-minded we are. Upper class families are considered to be more educated than lower class but the practice is more regnant in upper class families .So, basically education has barely led to any contribution in terms of change in our society. In fact , the dowry system has added to crimes against women ranging from emotional abuse ,injuries to deaths. Despite of strict laws against this evil practice dowry ,there are huge number of cases still present in our society just because, Indian judicial system highly lacks in giving justice and this justice can be exchanged with bribery of these rich conservative families.
We, who represent the current and the future of our country, need to raise a voice against dowry, in order to abolish this hateful practice and let marriage be an act of love and purity instead of greed and money.
What do you think we can really do in order to improve the mentality of our nation? Also, how about we the generation of today, work on this idea and start improving the thought pattern of India.
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